Learning to Care Less

by Ashley on December 7, 2012

As I was listening to the radio the other day (K-LOVE to be exact), there was a lady that came on to give some encouraging tips and advice. I rarely listen to these because I prefer music, but this one in particular caught my attention. She talked about how we need to learn to care less. We need to learn how to care less about the things that truly don’t matter and care more about the things that do matter.

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What if we cared less about what we looked like?

And cared more about those around us?

 

What if we cared less about what people think of us?

And cared more about what God thinks of us?

 

What if we cared less about the next meal we are going to consume?

And cared more about giving to the starving children across the world?

 

What if we cared less about what society is telling us?

And cared more about what God is telling us?

 

What if we cared less about having the “perfect body”?

And cared more about honoring God with our bodies?

 

What if we cared less about getting our to-do list done?

And cared more about spending time with our children and loved ones?

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This little message really struck a chord in me. Lately I’ve been struggling with some decisions that need to be made, and in the midst of it all, I have found myself stressing about the things that really don’t matter in the end. I can easily start worrying about what people think of me, stressing over my ever growing to-do list, and getting caught up in what society is constantly throwing at us. However, I know that’s not going to help me one bit. Once I start caring about the things that truly do matter, I start to feel more content and at peace.

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Maybe this is all a little deep for a Friday, but it was on my heart and I had to share! Winking smile I hope this will cause you to think about what truly matters in your life, particularly right now in the midst of the busy holiday season.

Enjoy your weekend!

Questions:

  • What do you need to care less about?
  • Did this message resonate with you?
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{ 61 comments… read them below or add one }

1 chelsey @ clean eating chelsey December 7, 2012 at 5:20 am

I need to care less about a lot of things – namely what others think about me. It’s gotten a lot better though!

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2 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:15 pm

Same here. Fortunately it’s improved for me the last few years too, but it’s still something I catch myself worrying about far more often than I should!

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3 Corey @ Learning Patience December 7, 2012 at 5:41 am

Living away from the US has truely helped me care less about everyone’s and my outside appearance – girls here in Trinidad are so much more confident and proud of their bodies in all shapes and sizes. It’s very refreshing! I need to care more about communicating with my friends afar…its easy to become lazy and stop cultivating my friendships.

xoxo from Trinidad

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4 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:16 pm

That’s so awesome Corey! Enjoy your time in Trinidad!

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5 Danica @ It's Progression December 7, 2012 at 5:51 am

I can relate to this so incredibly much…thank you for the reminder to focus on what is truly important!

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6 Renee @ Fit For Motherhood December 7, 2012 at 5:53 am

Oh my Ashely, this message was amazing. This really hit me especially this time of year.

Whenever anyone has minor problems my brother always says “Those are champagne problems”. He is so right. So lately I have been using that whenever I feel like I have anything to complain about. Anything in my life is minor compared to a lot of people in this world. I always strive to teach my girls people matter not things.

Chelsey I agree with you about caring what other people think. I have been working more on being confident in myself. :)

Thanks for this fantastic post. You have made me day once again. :)

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7 Katie @ Peace Love & Oats December 7, 2012 at 5:54 am

This is a seriously great post Ashley, definitely something we all need to consider. How different our lives would be if we focused our energy on the things that really matter instead of the trivial things.

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8 Nelly December 7, 2012 at 6:01 am

I totally agree with thinking LESS about what people think of you. IF you are happy with yourself that is all that matters! I just want to be a good example for others and to make it known that I am always willing to give a helping hand or listening ear.

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9 Shannon @ Skinny Sometimes December 7, 2012 at 6:03 am

Love this, have a great weekend :)

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10 emily December 7, 2012 at 6:06 am

Great post Ashley… caring less about ourselves and more care into what God thinks about us.. great reminder!

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11 Linz @ Itz Linz December 7, 2012 at 6:17 am

that message definitely resonates with me. i need to not care about those few extra lbs…. aint no thang and people probably don’t even notice! there are more important things in life!

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12 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:17 pm

Yes ma’am! ;) You are healthy and strong – keep it up!

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13 Danielle December 7, 2012 at 6:20 am

What an incredible post! Thank you for sharing!

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14 Sam @ Better With Sprinkles December 7, 2012 at 6:30 am

I need to care less about my grades! It sounds a little weird, but at this point in my life I know that I don’t want to continue with my education past my MA, so I don’t really need to have the highest grades possible. Instead, I want to focus on getting the best EXPERIENCE possible in grad school – volunteering, being active in the school community, and making time for myself and my social life instead of driving myself crazy trying to write the perfect paper.

Great post – something everything needs to think about once in a while!

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15 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Good for you Sam! I wish you the best with grad school and hope you can make the very best of it!

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16 Rachel December 7, 2012 at 6:34 am

Love this post and seeing your wedding pictures! I’m getting married soon, and it’s a great reminder to worry less about the details and to focus more on becoming a family :)

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17 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Congratulations on your upcoming wedding! It’s so easy to get caught up in the little things, but those things won’t matter as you look back at the day… Promise! ;)

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18 Angela @ Health's Angel December 7, 2012 at 6:40 am

This is something that I definitely struggle with, as most of us do. I have to say though, that I’m getting a lot better about not caring so much about what other people think. That used to absolutely consume me. Now, my attitude is that if you don’t like me…oh well. :)

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19 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Good for you Angela! That’s awesome! :)

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20 Emily @ Perfection Isn't Happy December 7, 2012 at 6:42 am

I love this post. I was actually just thinking about these things last night. I’m a little torn about where I want me career (or lack therof) to go, and I care too much what other people think of me and the path that I’m taking. I just need to stay focused on my husband and family and remember that in the end, they’re the ones that matter!

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21 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:20 pm

I can certainly relate to the career thing! Hang in here and just continue to remind yourself that it is YOUR life and YOUR career, so you need to do what’s best for YOU!

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22 Emily @ Perfection Isn't Happy December 7, 2012 at 6:42 am

thereof*

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23 Mallory @ ifgravityhappens December 7, 2012 at 6:49 am

This gave me chills…I love the dialogue between caring less and caring more. It’s so true and something to be remembered daily! :) Thanks for sharing!

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24 Sara @ fitcupcaker December 7, 2012 at 7:12 am

Thanks for this reminder. I think this is very important. I work with kids with cancer and I see everyday how I even take things for granted, how I care too much about little things that I shouldn’t. I try to teach my family and step son the same things. Have a good weekend!

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25 Katie @ SkinnyMinnieMoves December 7, 2012 at 7:22 am

Nice post. I wish I could think this way! But the truth is, it’s not that realistic :(

Maybe on days off and weekends we can really focus on these things, but daily it’s super hard to! Not trying to be negative AT ALL. Like I said, I would love to be this way!

It stinks we live in a world that petty things matter!

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26 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:22 pm

Hmm I have to disagree that it’s unrealistic! I think it’s very realistic, but we have to make a point of training our minds differently and the way we think to make it happen. I’m not saying it’s easy, but I do think it’s do-able!

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27 Jordyn December 7, 2012 at 7:31 am

Thank you so much. I am going through some struggles with a sister who has distanced herself from my family, and it seems that God is continuing to show me that focusing on my family right now is so much more important than working out ‘x’ number times a week or caring about my own wants.

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28 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:22 pm

I’m sorry to hear that Jordyn. I wish you the best with your family, and I hope the situation gets better!

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29 Ali December 7, 2012 at 7:34 am

I need to start caring less about the little minute details of life and just let things flow! Thanks for sharing:)

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30 Sarah @ Blonde Bostonian December 7, 2012 at 7:39 am

This is a great post, Ashley! I totally agree with you. I too get caught up sometimes in how people may perceive different aspects about my life and my appearance. But I have to let it go. Focus on MY life and ME! Happy weekend!

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31 Emily Butler December 7, 2012 at 7:40 am

I totally love this, I just started reading So Long Insecurity by Beth Moore, only a few pages in but boy do I need it!

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32 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:25 pm

I’ll have to check that one out! I love Beth Moore!

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33 Kristen Waby December 7, 2012 at 8:05 am

I definitely know what you mean. Last night I was thinking the same thought as my daughter and I ate supper. Instead of doing the laundry (which was monstrous in size). We got out a new paint set and painted for an hour and then enjoyed a good play doh session. Landry and dishes can wait. When we die, are we really going to say, “Man, I wish I cleaned my house more?” Love this post. It’s always a good reminder before the weekend.

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34 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:27 pm

Good for you Kristen! I hope you and your little girl had a fun play date together! :)

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35 Amanda @ .running with spoons. December 7, 2012 at 8:11 am

LOVE the message in this post, and it’s perfect for a Friday – very uplifting :D I’ve gotten a lot better at caring less about things the older I get. I used to care so much about what others think of me, and about trying to have the perfect diet and body, but that mentality definitely never made me happy. I’ve found that taking the focus off myself and concentrating on what I can do for others really helped to change my perspective.

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36 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:28 pm

Absolutely! I definitely believe changing our focus outwards to others rather than on ourselves all the time is KEY!

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37 Molly @ Just Your Average Athlete December 7, 2012 at 8:16 am

Wow, this post and message really resonated with me… It is such a great thing to think about, especially during this time of year. But it also made me realize I really could work on “caring less.” It’s difficult for me to not care what others think about me. I can get way too caught up in it and try to please everyone, even if it means making myself unhappy in the process. I need to put into perspective the trivial things I worry about and let them go because there are much bigger things going on around me that deserve that extra attention.

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38 Natalie @ Free Range Human December 7, 2012 at 8:24 am

This resonates with me as well. I’m most definitely guilty of some of the these, and I really need to learn to care less about bod image. Or maybe not care less, but redefine my feelings about it.

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39 Amy December 7, 2012 at 8:28 am

Ashley, thank you so much for posting this. I have been struggling myself and it really put A LOT of things into prospective. Have a blessed weekend!

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40 Laurie @ Love, Laugh, Laurie December 7, 2012 at 8:30 am

I definitely agree! I need to focus more on the things that truly matter and stop stressing about what doesn’t!

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41 Brittany December 7, 2012 at 8:53 am

You pretty much just relayed EXACTLY why I decided it was in my best interest to take a little blog hiatus. Sometimes we just need a step back to be able to gain some perspective, and I was in dire need of re-recognizing what truly matters to me.

As always, thanks for the honesty, Ash!

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42 Alex @ therunwithin December 7, 2012 at 9:13 am

this is such a tough one and so understand this, it is hard to not get caught up in those things we really shouldn’t need to care about but do.

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43 Molly @ Happy&Healthy December 7, 2012 at 9:20 am

This is a great reminder! It is so easy to get caught up in things that we should care less about, and I do it all the time (what people think about me is a big one). Especially around the holidays when everything seems to be about gifts, but should be about family and friends.

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44 Lisa December 7, 2012 at 9:29 am

This is such a great post Ashley! I need to put much more focus into things that really matter in my heart rather than those little trivial things!

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45 Meghan @ After the Ivy League December 7, 2012 at 9:35 am

Totally agree with this post. There’s no point in worrying about what others think, it’s beyond your control. And none of it matters in the end, all that will matter is what God thinks :)

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46 Claire @ Keeping Up With Claire December 7, 2012 at 9:52 am

This is so true. I used to care so much about what others thought about me, and it started to stress me out too much. Once I stopped caring, all the stress was gone and I felt so much better. Plus, if someone is judging you, they are probably unhappy with their lives, so let them be and we can keep on being happy. Great post girl!

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47 Maria @ lift love life December 7, 2012 at 10:08 am

Awesome post. This really hit home for me too. I definitely need to stop caring so much about everything being perfect. Why does it matter so much? I have no idea. But I’m sure my kitchen will still be there in the morning just fine if I don’t clean it one night, and I’m sure my husband isn’t going to suddenly divorce me if I don’t make every meal a Martha Stewart meal. There are so many high expectations for women lately and it’s completely exhausting. This was just another reminder for me to just chill.

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48 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Well said Maria! ;)

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49 Dexy December 7, 2012 at 10:40 am

That was really beautiful and I love to be reminded of what really matters. It does take a constant awareness, doesn’t it? It’s so easy to end up thinking and doing according to society–thanks for the reminder!! PS How have you adjusted to the extra blonde look? I love it!! What does Codster think?

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50 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:35 pm

The blonde is growing on me more and more, and I still love the cut! Codster LOVES it. He’s an odd ball and is the only man I know that prefers SHORT hair, so he was all about me cutting it. :)

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51 Annette@Fitness Perks December 7, 2012 at 12:13 pm

Beautiful!

Life is soooo much happier when we don’t let the world tell us how we should feel & look, and instead honor what God made us to be like & how HE views/thinks of us. :)

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52 Michelle@Peachy Palate December 7, 2012 at 12:15 pm

I need to care less about trying to be perfect all the time…completely unattainable! Lovely post to start off the weekend!

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53 Amber December 7, 2012 at 3:11 pm

This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately! At my church we’ve been studying 2 Peter and its really been challenging but super helpful as well! Also I’ve started reading a book called “People are big and God is small” which I encourage you to read :)

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54 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:35 pm

Thanks Amber! I’ll have to look for that book!

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55 Amber December 8, 2012 at 3:26 pm

I just realised I misspelt the title as I wasn’t at home – it’s ‘When people are big and God is small’ and it’s written by Edward T. Welch :)

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56 Kimberly December 7, 2012 at 4:27 pm

WOW! This is great especially after the week I had. Love love love your heart.

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57 Ashley December 8, 2012 at 2:36 pm

I hope you have a great weekend and that it can make up for this past week! ;)

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58 Elizabeth @ myneonrunningshoes December 7, 2012 at 6:20 pm

Thanks for this reminder. It’s always nice to have concrete reminders to pull your mind back to what’s important.

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59 Kristen @ notsodomesticated December 8, 2012 at 8:44 am

Such a great point, Ashley! There are so many things that I need to care less about right now, so that I can prioritize what’s REALLY important! ;)

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60 Brittany @ Delights and Delectables December 8, 2012 at 7:04 pm

I needed this today. In fact, I’m printing it out. Thanks friend!

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61 Julie December 11, 2012 at 12:05 am

Thank you for this awesome post. If I stopped worrying about how I look, I have so much more fun and life is just better.

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