My Heart Is Heavy

I had a few other post ideas in the back of my head for today, but there’s one main thing that has been consuming my mind lately. I debated about bringing it up on the blog, but, here we are.

My heart is heavy.

We have a big decision to make in the next few months: Do we stay in Utah or do we move back to Arizona?

I’m not going to go into a lot of detail, but there’s a potential opportunity for Cody’s job in the next few months in the Phoenix area, and we need to decide what we want to do. More importantly, what God wants us to do.

Proverbs 19:21

For those of you that may not know, Cody and I were both raised in Arizona and most of our family still lives there. We’ve been here in Utah for the past four(ish) years, and for the past year or more we’ve thrown around the idea of moving back to Arizona. We are both big family people, and we miss our families dearly.

But, we don’t entirely feel at peace about moving back. There’s a lot of things that are drawing us back to Arizona, but there are also a lot of things that are making us want to hold on to Utah.

Utah has become our home. We’ve made dear friends here. We feel like God may still have more work for us here.

But, there’s career opportunities in Arizona, we have family that lives there, and the idea of a new adventure is exciting.


God, please give us wisdom and direction. Lead us where YOU want us. Help us to be open to wherever that is, and please help our family and friends to be understanding of what Your will is for us.

And friends, please pray, because we need those prayers.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...


  1. says

    Oh my gosh Ashley! We are in a VERY similar situation and my hear goes out to your family. Ours is between staying in DC and moving to Florida (closer to family). I am praying for you and your little family and doing what HE thinks is best (even if that means letting down family and friends…which is very hard for me to do).

  2. says

    praying for you and your family…. xoxo i know that you all will live a fulfilling life either place… my brother and jonny’s brother both live in arizona so uhhh maybe i could see you if you moved there?? #selfishreason lol

  3. says

    Keeping you and your family in my thoughts, Ashley. Whatever happens will happen for a reason and offer great opportunities to you. Everything will fall into place. Sending you lots of positive thoughts during this difficult time!

  4. Katie H. says

    I’m with Danica..In a few months we’ll be moving a very long ways from our families for his job. You really have to do what you think is best for your little family. PS it could always be worse and less desirable..remember that.

  5. says

    I’m praying for you guys, Ash! We had a very similar situation when we made the move to Richmond 2 years ago. It was quicker than your time frame (a matter of weeks) but we took a leap of faith and it’s worked out better than I could have EVER imagined. Listen to your heart, and erase your mind of “the shoulds.”

  6. says

    We had to make the decision last year to either stay in Arizona or move to Denver. It was a difficult decision too, but due to family, we decided to live closer to them. Hopefully you will feel at peace in whatever decision you decide.

  7. says

    We were in similar situation last month. I am commuting to Cologne for many years for 40 minutes/direction. My boyfriend got a job which is 60 minutes in the same directions, so we were thinking about moving to Cologne. My soul was hurting for leaving the beautiful place that we have, that is our first home together, in the city where we have friends, but we eventually decided to be reasonable and look for a flat in Cologne. After 4 weeks of search and 12 applications we got rejected at 12 places (we are actually good tenants, with good salary,academic career etc., but there was always someone better). Even though we are not really religious we took it as a sign to stay where we are, get the car and enjoy our small flat.
    I am keeping my fingers that you get your sign!

  8. says

    What a tough decision! I will definitely be praying for you and sending good thoughts down. We are going through the same thing right now. We moved to Alaska a couple of years ago to have an adventure. But we are feeling drawn back to the Midwest with the idea of settling into careers, having a family, and being closer to relatives. Stuck between two good decisions. Whatever you decide will be right for your family :)

  9. says

    I have been dealing with a very similar huge decision. Stay here (where I have an amazing network of family and friends), or move to Seattle. It’s rough-certainly not easy! But I have no doubt that whatever you guys do, it will be right for you. As of now, I will probably be moving to Seattle in a few months.

  10. Traci says

    I think opportunities present themselves for a reason. If you were thinking about moving back to Arizona – and now the chance is here – maybe it’s your decision made for you? Good luck! It’s the not knowing that makes it nerve-wracking, but you can’t make the wrong choice. The beauty of life is that is keeps changing.

  11. says

    I’ll definitely be putting out lots of positive thoughts for you and Cody during this time!
    Moving can be quite the challenge. I’m going to have to move in a few months, and I am actually really not looking forward to it. For one I don’t know a single person where I’ll be living, but I’m moving for school so I know it must be done and it’s not forever.
    Moving is always a big decision, so my thoughts and prayers are with you! I know you guys will end up in the best situation for you!

  12. says

    I’d say go where it’s warm!!! Hopefully you figure out soon what the right thing to do is! I don’t think I know your story on how you ended up in Utah in the first place. I’d love to hear that ;). Tyler has a friend in Arizona, so if you ever move back, then we HAVE to meet up if we go there (Tyler wants to make a trip in May actually!!)

  13. says

    I’ll be praying for you. I know a decision that has pros and cons on both sides is never easy, and it can be really difficult to ever know if you’ve made the right one. I hope God shows you the right path in this, and gives you some peace in your decision!

  14. says

    Thats a very tough decision to make. Ill pray that you find some clarity and are able to make a decisions soon! At least both are good options. It would be much worse if you were being forced to move away from family, so this should be an esier transition than when you moved to Utah, right? :-)

  15. Sarah says

    Man, that would be a really tough decision to make. I will say a prayer for you all, hopefully the answer will become more clear soon.

  16. says

    Where God’s will is, is the best place to be! Sounds like you both are prayerfully considering each pro/con concerning the possible move 😉 That’s wonderful, He will direct you when you are listening! Excited to hear what He shows you along the way.

  17. says

    That is such a tough decision! It looks like you are so happy in Utah but I’m sure to be closer to family would be nice. While I haven’t experienced it myself I will say it is probably best to do it now while Hunter is still young rather than when he’s older. I’m sure you’ve already thought of that but just my two cents :-)

  18. says

    Tough decision for sure. As someone who lives far away from all of my family, I know how difficult it is not to have them close by. But then again we have found a wonderful “family” of friends in our new state. Good luck and thinking of you!

  19. Nicole says

    You and your family are in my prayers. Major life decisions are tough – on the heart and on the mind. I hope you find peace through God and through the love of your family as you and Cody work through this decision. You’ll have friends and supporters no matter where you are!

  20. Sharon says

    We’re sending good energy your way. Good luck identifying the best path for yourself and your family! Patience is hard some times – but what’s to come, if it’s meaningful, is always worth the wait. :0)

  21. Beth a. says

    I’ve been reading for about a year but have never (or maybe once?) commented. I got chills reading your post. We are constantly going back and forth about moving closer to family. It’s such a difficult decision! God has also blessed us with a dear church family and friends which would make it so hard to leave. Praying for direction and a common vision for your family.

  22. says

    I don’t envy your decision, but what a fabulous dilemma to have! It sounds like you really have 2 good options. But I know the decision isn’t an easy one. I’ll be praying God will reveal to you his will for your family. I know he will…in HIS timing.

  23. says

    I’m late to this post — but you will figure what’s best for your family!! I’m thinking of your. Being an adult is hard, right??? I really hate big decisions!!

  24. Beth says

    Praying that God guides you to your decision. Either decision will bring you good things. You can’t lose. You will make it work and focus on the positive aspects of the final decision and know that you made the best decision for you with God’s help. I hate decisions. I suffer badly from “paralysis by analysis”. I need to give it to God, but I am a control freak…a perfectionist that believes that there is always a perfect choice…a life and death choice where one will bring me happiness and good things and the other will be a mistake. It’s hard, impossible, for me to know which one to chose without the ability to look into the future. If I do end up making a choice, I usually beat myself up for it afterwards, always thinking I made the biggest mistake of my life that will only bring me more unhappiness….that I lost the possibility of having a better life. So, I stay stuck. I don’t do anything and I remain lonely, depressed, eating disordered, and miserable. I once read a sign that said “Face fear with Action”. I am unable to do this. I know you can, though. You are in such a good place, mind and body and spirit. You will make the right decision with the guidance of God, your husband, and your entire family. Trust yourself, sweetie. We all do.

  25. Beth says

    I have been wanting to move for years, but have been unable to make a decisions as to where to move or the guts to leave. I think I would be happier somewhere warmer…but I am scared, too.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *